What’s the greatest line in The Godfather? Rather than pick the obvious choice – “I’m gonna make him an offer he can’t refuse” – the Opera Godfather 50th Anniversary’s rose gold music boxes cycle through no less than 13 quotes. Talk about overkill . . .

Not that there’s anything wrong with that. When you’re selling one of, if not the world’s most garish watch – a timepiece that celebrates a movie about a murderous Mafia boss – too much is not enough. A goal that Jacob & Co. achieves in spectacular fashion.

If you thought the original 49mm Godfather watch (above) was over-the-top – and by God it is – the 50th Anniversary model takes it to a whole ‘nother level.

Not only do the Anniversary watch’s rollers roll on gems like “Luca Brasi sleeps with the fishes,” the watchmakers have added laser-engraved movie scenes around the case. And plopped a hand-engraved, hand-painted rose in smack dab in the middle of the, uh, face.

That would be the rose the Godfather wears on his lapel in the movie’s opening scene, when the Don agrees to “take care of” an undertaker’s daughter’s boyfriend problem. Permanently.

I prefer the Godfather figurine sitting on his throne smoking a stogie in the previous watch, but that’s because I’m a cigar aficionado and a huge fan of what art critics call kitsch, what I call exuberant tastelessness (e.g., Velvet Elvii).

Yes, that’s the horse whose head ends up in bed

Don’t get me wrong. While I could be convinced to wear J&C’s Oil Pump watch, I don’t have the chutzpah to wear the Opera Godfather 50th Anniversary.

That said, I’m glad I live in a country where watchmakers feel free to put cement shoes on generations of horological tradition and toss it into the ocean, to appeal to people who have no taste. Or do and don’t give a sh*t.

Godfather script not included

But whatever you do, don’t call the Opera Godfather 50th Anniversary tacky. The watch doesn’t meet the criteria set forth by the good folks at Oxford comma-loving vocabulary.com: “cheap, flashy, garish, gaudy, loud, tawdry, or trashy.” OK, the cheap part.

I mean, a half million dollars? Sure the Opera’s movement boasts 658 components, 58 jewels, a 50-hour power reserve and, just for fun, a triple axis tourbillon. Yes, it’s water resistant to 30m. And you get a red and green enamel Godfather pen and crystal decanter. But where are the diamonds?

Is it wrong of me to miss the sparklers adorning the $750k Opera Godfather Minute Repeater‘s music rolls? I’m not saying lose the quotes. I’m saying find a place!

Oh wait. Jacob and Co. make a $1.2m Opera Godfather Baguette Diamonds – with no room for anything other than the “basics” and 59 diamonds.

I guess I don’t share The Sultans of Swank’s purity of vision (for lack of a better term). But I sure do admire it. Why? Because I believe in America!